I don’t even like saying the word and as I type I am still unsure of what to talk about so no one takes offense. The past two weeks in Nashville and our county have been strange. We have experienced a tornado hit our beloved town then only days later we are seeing the unimaginable happen in our country/world. I have seen love, support and community come together in the most beautiful way and then an entire shift to panic. There are so many views, so many articles, so many posts happening that I have tried to stay offline as much as humanly possible yet our lively hood revolves around current events and public appearances. Here goes something…

Craig left for Austin, Texas today to play a festival in Round Rock. Do we post about it? Do we share with people that he is on his way to do his job? We did. Not sure if it was the “correct” decision but as a family we made it. We decided that because it was outside of the metropolis that is Austin and because the cases are few nearby, and Craig’s fans are attending that driving (rather than flying) and playing an acoustic show while being as conscious of cleanliness as possible was a must. He/We are absolutely aware of the importance of being “quarantined” and respect everyone’s thoughts. Every mic will be sanitized, there will be elbow bumps instead of hugs, and when he gets home there will be a lot of laundry to do but this situation will be handled in the most cleanly and safe way possible. I hope his fans and our friends know and respect that.

We have also “stocked up”. We have enough toilet paper for two weeks, formula, diapers and wipes for two weeks and food for TWO WEEKS. I am the most protective mom on the planet but we did not go shopping in bulk for anything. We shopped responsibly knowing that there are other new moms out there who need exactly what I do and there are elderly people looking to have food in their fridge too. This panic is scary. This shift in our economy is scary. We aren’t sure we will get deposits or any new shows in the next few months and THAT. IS. SCARY. Prayer and family time has been the only thing that seems to keep me from grinding my teeth at night.

My personality has always been the “half glass full” kinda gal. My figurative glass is half full knowing that I have enjoyed three days with my tribe. No phones, no news, just outdoors, cuddles and close friends. We have taught Dakota to ride a bike with no training wheels successfully and I am so stinking proud of her. Jaxon has learned two new songs on piano and is now honing in on his drum skills (SOS Johannes!). Graydon is learning colors and has mastered the rainbow with the help of M&M’s. Boston has us all smiling with every one of his new smiles. Craig and I are talking less and loving more. If I wasn’t so worried about our careers and humanity I would chalk this moment in time up as precious. That being said, my literal glass right now is half full because I don’t think I could experience this many emotions without a glass of wine or two.

Yesterday I needed out of the house so I went and detailed our car from front to back. Aside from wine, reading and praying… cleaning has become my new therapy. I needed a moment to reflect. Afterwards, I found myself going to Dollar General for ice cream for our kids because they are absolute rockstars. The other day Dakota and Gray were playing and Graydon came running into our room saying “Mommy there is a Mado (tornado) outside”. In that moment I realized how much they hear, see and absorb. In that moment I knew that my tension was rubbing off on him. Then Jaxon came home clinging to a stuffed animal which he has never done. His school was flattened by a tornado two weeks ago and now he knows that he won’t be going back for a while because people are getting sick. I asked Craig if we should take the “stuffy” away and he said “No. They are kids and they have feelings bigger than ours.” Moral of all of this… Love. Let people feel. And know that children are hearing and feeling all of the emotions that you have. I don’t think anyone should hide them but they should be talked about and then cover everyone in enough kisses and hugs to make the scary disappear. It is difficult, I am not saying it is easy but remember you are the leader of your pack and you want to make that pack as strong and comfortable as possible. (I say this to myself as I type because this is new territory and I am obviously learning as I go to).

Love you all, wash your hands, and share with me any creative ideas you might have for adults and kids alike to stay sane during this time of chaos. xo

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